Hypnosis and SEX

Clinical Hypnosis and Psychosexual Disorders


“Many sexual problems are the result of performance anxiety and can be compounded by associations or behavioural responses which are not longer appropriate” Hypnotherapy can be used as a method to reduce anxiety and to help the patient develop new more useful habits and responses.

Sexual dysfunction can be divided loosely into two categories, those caused by physical conditions such as a hormonal dysfunction, diabetes, physical problems, medication or aging. The first step to treatment is to identify secondary causes by visiting a medical specialist or doctor. On the other hand, sexual dysfunction has a significant psychological component with issues of intimacy, self worth, performance anxiety or fear of sexual relations.

Clinical hypnosis is a therapeutic approach used with a wide variety of anxiety-based and behavioural conditions. The therapy is safe and there are no serious side effects although all experts agree that you should visit a qualified and accredited hypnotherapist.

A significant number of patients suffer from psycho-sexual conditions. Research in 1995 in both Britain and Scandinavian indicate that hypnosis is at least 75% successful in treating erectile dysfunction (ED) which cannot be linked to physical cause. One of the problems is that the patient is self conscious and focusing on the problem. They have a deep seated expectation of failure and eventually that takes over and they cannot perform. This can result in a self-fulfilling prophesy and the feeling of failure and shame can cause the patient to avoid sexual relations. It is a highly distressing condition and one that responds well to hypnotherapy.

“Most psycho-sexual problems have a significant component of performance anxiety. I usually start by reducing the general anxiety levels and re-building the patient’s sense of self-esteem. Sometimes we go into the details that triggered the ED”. This can be a humiliating experience, guilt, sometimes even a trauma. But most patients also experience a deep sense of personal failure. For example, patient failed to have sex with his wife but not a prostitute because he felt a failure in their marriage.

Part of the hypnotherapy involves using metaphor and embedded suggestion. This method allows for a subtle build up of suggestions for successful erection without triggering the anxiety. Therapist will use the power of the imagination to create a future where the patient is successful. This creates a neural pathway towards an expectation of success. Similarly, patients are taught to imagine themselves at a future time where they are waking up next to a satisfied wife, or feeling proud and sexually successful. Sometimes we use metaphor and focus the imagination onto images of strong wild horses or other symbols that are meaningful to the patient. These imagined associations are also useful because they allow the hypnotherapist to connect the patient to associations and feelings of success.

It takes considerable skill and experience to be able to talk sensitively and directly to a patient suffering from a psycho-sexual dysfunction. When a couple can work together and support each other the therapeutic process is made easier. Couples can practice at home, activities which are enjoyable and reinforces their success and intimacy.

Admitting to a sexual problem can be embarrassing and many people develop low self-esteem. They feel as if something is wrong with them and become isolated within their marriage or relationship and sometimes avoiding friends and peer group. In Malaysian society patients may go the other extreme and involve the whole family when there are marriage problems. Frustrated wife eager to start a family and may discussed the problem with the other family members. This entrenched the feelings of humiliation and failure the husband was experiencing. Husband may be unable to cope with the extended family knowing his problem.

Premature ejaculation affects approximately 30% of men suffering from psycho-sexual problems, world wide. There are a number of contributors (sometimes post traumatic stress and occasionally medication). Clinical hypnosis can be used along with other treatments for trauma. Hypnotherapy is also effective where the patient has a conditioned response to ejaculating quickly. This is a habit which can develop in adolescents who are exploring sexually but also need to avoid detection by parents or other siblings. It becomes a dysfunction when it persists into adult life and is made worse by anxiety. There are a number of clinical hypnosis techniques which can help to prolong the erection, by reducing anxiety, focusing the patient’s attention onto his partner, encouraging a new more adult behaviour and confirming a sense of personal and sexual confidence.

Contributors are often socio-cultural factors which interfere with the normal sexual response. Hypnosis is used to create an emotionally safe place from which the patient can explore their feelings. As they develop confidence hypnosis can also help the patient imagine social and sexual situations whilst at the same time remaining in their mental “safe place”. This is a useful method for patients with limited knowledge about sex and sexuality or who have had very controlling parents. This mental role play allows the patient to develop social and emotional skills and explore how to cope with rejection and acceptance without the fear of humiliation. This method called is called “in vitro” and it provides a mental dress rehearsal. This technique can be useful for a patient who has little experience of sex or a patient who has a sexual problem such as ED and needs to come to terms with their own responses and feelings.

Sexuality is much more than just sexual practice. For both men and women sexuality encompasses a very broad range of physical activities and psychological experiences. These activities define how people see themselves within society and affect their sense of self-esteem and purpose. A clinical hypnotherapist must work with all these different levels of complex personal and social relationship because the sexual experience fulfils an important human desire for physical and emotional closeness and intimacy. The hypnosis session often includes how the patient sees himself, how he or he relates to others, the patient’s attitude towards sex and previous sexual experiences and the patient’s generalized identity as a sexual person. In addition, feelings about one’s partner and relationship may also affect sexual satisfaction.

Dr Wong is a graduate of the London College of Clinical Hypnosis Asia (LCCH). For more information of Clinical Hypnosis or hypnotherapy contact the London College of Clinical Hypnosis on www.hypnosis-malaysia.com